ARE Questionnaire
From: Hold Me Tight, Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love (Johnson, S.)
This questionnaire demonstrates the behaviours that bring about deeper emotional connection.
When you build these behaviours into your relationship, you will feel a shift in the way you relate to each other.
Each of these actions will strengthen emotional responsiveness between you.
Pick one action item and try it every day for seven days.
From your viewpoint, is your partner accessible to you?
1. I can get my partner’s attention easily T/F
2. My partner is easy to connect with emotionally T/F
3. My partner shows me that I come first with him/her. T/F
4. I am not feeling lonely or shut out in this relationship T/F
5. I can share my deepest feelings with my partner. He/she will listen T/F
From your viewpoint, is your partner responsive to you?
1. If I need connections and comfort, he/she will be there for me T/F
2. My partner responds to signals that I need him/her to come close T/F
3. I find I can lean upon my partner when I am anxious or unsure T/F
4. Even when we fight or disagree, I know that I am important to my partner, and we will find a way to come together T/F
5. If I need reassurance about how important I am to my partner, I can get it T/F
Are you positively and emotionally engaged with each other?
1. I feel very comfortable being close to and trusting my partner T/F
2. I can confide in my partner about almost anything T/F
3. I feel confident, even when we are apart that we are connected to each other T/F
4. I know that my partner cares about my joys, hurts and fears T/F
5. I feel safe enough to take emotional risks with my partner T/F